Lauren Voltaire

[Lauren Voltaire]

Both myself and Lauren have attained the age of majority (we are both 18+).

I do indeed have previous roleplaying experience! Though my experience comes from a site with a different posting style to this one's, so I'm looking forward to getting into the swing of things here!

[Bastion Sandstone]

I'm all for Lauren, but take a look at "Fighting Style" again. You talk about rotating to make fields and the such, and where butterfly knives are store, but I have no idea how she would fight a Grimm. I only have a vague idea of why the butterfly knives are there. I don't know if they are flung with magnetic pulls or if her semblance causes them to shoot out lightning bolts. I understand how Tonfas work, but you mention a blade on them, and tonfas normally don't have blades. Is it a spike at the end? Is it a blade down the forearm? And what does the dust covering the knives do?

I'm ready and willing to say yes to this great character concept, but I want to see this a bit clearer first.

[SheidelII]

I think Lauren Voltaire's Fighting Style could use more elaboration. Her Fighting Style goes into how she utilizes her Semblance with her equipment to enact an effect, but how Lauren herself fights isn't really made clear. You make certain aspects of her kit clear in their purpose, but to what ends they are used towards needs more information. Lauren's contortionism and how she uses it to change the angle of her weapons is more of what the description needs, the actual application of her weapons and martial enactment of her physical skills. Lauren's approach to combat, in short.

Another thing I would like more information on would be the costs associated with the different levels of Electromotivation's uses. You have an example of the physical toll it can take on Lauren with temporary delirium in the case of overuse, but not in the more moderate uses, such as with her custom armor. The smaller-scale uses that she can perform with her Semblance aren't outlined, so it's difficult to tell the scope of what it can do. Aside from causing a massive lightning strike. Write more on her control over electromotive forces, what it costs on her Aura for Lauren to use it in what way.

I find her kit interesting. Looking forward to seeing it expanded on.

[Lauren Voltaire]

Wheeeeeee finals are due today but I decided to make edits anyway! How's that, my friends?

[Myron Hyles]

I didn't read it before your edits, but her fighting style appears pretty clear to me : I can very well imagine a tornado of blades and flying batangas spinning around crazily and raining blows on everything. She seems intense alright

I have a slight problem with her Semblance though. The way you describe it makes me think there is an implied limitation somewhere, because she needs her coils to use it.
Manipulating magnetic fields (like Pyrrha) is powerful, but manipulating electrical fields can be incredibly strong. She gets dizzy with several million volts for a lightning strike, but what about outlet voltage ? With some Water Dust and that Semblance, she could electrocute someone hard.

[Bastion Sandstone]

If she has two tonfas, I'm guessing this part: "She uses her batangas knives mostly either to parry attacks coming in from awkward angles or to make explosive attacks at the enemy by flinging them away from herself using her Semblance." Means that she uses the magnetic fields enabled by her fancy armor to keep the knives floating around her. However, you only talk of pushing and pulling magnetic objects. Makes sense, but I'm not sure how or why Lauren would be able to control each knife individually to such a degree to parry attacks(only being held in space by magnetic forces and nothing more solid). Being thrown makes sense, but I question the accuracy you could get from a simple push and pull mechanic. It doesn't seem like she can make objects float around her and control them at will, but can push objects away or pull them to her. If she were to, say, use the knife points to shoot lightning out because of current flow and all of that, I could get behind that sort of manipulation.

[Lauren Voltaire]

To respond to your first two comments, Myron, she uses the coils of wire to convert the difference in potential into a magnetic field, since that's what she mainly uses to deflect or attract enemy weapons near her person. There's no limit, implied or otherwise, in her using it for a different purpose (such as creating electric fields between two points with different potential).

Beyond the personal range, though, she hasn't fully realized the potential utility of her Semblance, since the only thing she can think of to do with it is to create electric arcs. Doing so with a lesser potential difference than extremely high voltages (such as those that create lightning) inherently needs a medium that's significantly more electrically permittive than air (8.85E-12 Farads per meter), so she only does so as a last resort due to how it essentially knocks her out. It's entirely possible that she'll realize that you can use it at lesser voltages, such as zapping people through their weapons if your own weapon is charged and they're grounded, but right now that's simply not something she's capable of - your imagination is the real limit to anything with an open-ended application, after all.

On your last comment, it would actually be incredibly difficult, if not impossible, to electrocute someone with Water Dust, as pure water (which Water Dust creates) is not an electrical conductor (7.78E-10 Farads per meter).



To yours, Bastian, she knows where all her knives are, and her precise control of her armor's potential allows her to both throw them away from her and pull them back if they're still close enough - it's usually enough to ward off an attack by putting another moving metallic object in its way, especially if your goal is to parry rather than block.

She can also throw the knives at other targets, but she tries not to do it as an attack method, since she then has to go retrieve them and she only has four to begin with - not to mention the wild inaccuracy of throwing something with a semidirectional field. She might get better at this with practice (or when she realizes that she can do more than just channel an electrical current into a loop of wire to make a magnetic field), but that's currently beyond her reach.

Shooting lightning out of the tips of the knives would be just as difficult as calling lightning from the sky, unless she finds a way to break the laws of physics (or a way to strap a battery to the knife).

[Myron Hyles]

I vote Yes now, the addition of a limited range (or at least a drawback from a certain distance) to her Semblance makes it clearer what she can and can't do. Writing a fight with her is gonna be hard, but it's your challenge
I like her character overall too.

[Bastion Sandstone]

In terms of the lightning from her knives, her whole semblance is differences and letting a flow happen. Maybe not the power like natural lightning, but having electricty spark and shock towards an enemy could work. Creating a big build up on your knife and a large lack at your target could induce a flow, although not a garuntee. Just a thought, may not work in practice.

I'll vote yes with these changes.

[Lauren Voltaire]

I am officially done with my undergraduate! Now it's just a waiting game on approval for my thesis.

How's it look to you now, SheidelII?

[SheidelII]

I think I'm fine with approving this character for roleplay. I would like a bit more in regards to the Dust coated batangas blades you mention Lauren having in her Fighting Style; how she uses it. Unless that's what you meant when you talked about the "explosive attacks" she uses them for, in which case, just some clear statements about such.

I look forward to how the profile will expand over the course of this character's involvement in Colors. It's a little sparse as it is, but there seems to be enough there to work with. Have fun.