Y'all know me and my love of short profiles by now, but Az is new here. How's she look t'y'all?
Azoireda Ikteris
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Azoireda Ikteris
- Posts: 54
- Joined: Sat Jun 19, 2021 4:51 am
- Age: 19
- Gender Identity: Female
- Race: Human
- Aura Color: Bright Yellow
- Occupation: Student
- Semblance Name: Dilatorius
- Weapon Name: Aspiration and Judgment
Az's Semblance must be rubbing off on me.
Y'all know me and my love of short profiles by now, but Az is new here. How's she look t'y'all?
Y'all know me and my love of short profiles by now, but Az is new here. How's she look t'y'all?
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Bartok Evergreen
- Posts: 253
- Joined: Fri Dec 18, 2020 11:13 am
- Age: 18
- Gender Identity: Male
- Race: Faunus (Vampire Bat)
- Aura Color: Blood Red
- Occupation: Student
- Semblance Name: Bleed and Drink
- Weapon Name: Coiled Sting
Ok, gotta say, very unique passive Semblance idea. Reminds me of Alcatraz Versus the Evil Librarians. I can't find anything that states whether or not passive Semblances need to be unlocked first before they are active, or if they are just always around. Semblances are normally fueled by Aura, so one might think you may have to unlock Aura before a Semblance, even a passive one, manifests. But Semblances and Aura can be unlocked in several ways, and not always by trauma. Az's Semblance being that she's late to everything starting at the beginning of her life I guess is the only early thing that's ever happened to her.
The backstory is a little bare, though short ones are fine. After a second read-through I was able to understand the gist of her life to this point.
By "overbalanced" for her swords, do you mean "off-balance"? Like heavy in the blade? Heavy in the hilt? You don't want weight focused on the blade unless it's for hacking and chopping, while heavy in the hilt would give you a lot of point control. Them being short, you'd want them to be balanced well so she doesn't tire herself out just swinging the things around.
I like her constantly trying to work against the effects of her Semblance, gives her more of a choice and work to do just to do something normal people do. Struggle. I like it.
Per Freelancer Approval guidlelines, I don't see anything totally out of place here. The Semblance coming in as a baby I could see some people having an issue with, but Freelancers are given a lot more freedom with their profiles and so I think it's fine either way. Even if you do have to unlock Aura for passive Semblances to become active, I think her having it from birth is pretty interesting and sets her apart, shows more struggle through her entire life. I would like a tad more extra clarity in her backstory highlights regarding her brother, her mother's death, and maybe the father? Also, Aspiration and Judgement or only swords? No gun morphs? No long range options besides her pouch?
But I'll still be voting yes.
The backstory is a little bare, though short ones are fine. After a second read-through I was able to understand the gist of her life to this point.
By "overbalanced" for her swords, do you mean "off-balance"? Like heavy in the blade? Heavy in the hilt? You don't want weight focused on the blade unless it's for hacking and chopping, while heavy in the hilt would give you a lot of point control. Them being short, you'd want them to be balanced well so she doesn't tire herself out just swinging the things around.
I like her constantly trying to work against the effects of her Semblance, gives her more of a choice and work to do just to do something normal people do. Struggle. I like it.
Per Freelancer Approval guidlelines, I don't see anything totally out of place here. The Semblance coming in as a baby I could see some people having an issue with, but Freelancers are given a lot more freedom with their profiles and so I think it's fine either way. Even if you do have to unlock Aura for passive Semblances to become active, I think her having it from birth is pretty interesting and sets her apart, shows more struggle through her entire life. I would like a tad more extra clarity in her backstory highlights regarding her brother, her mother's death, and maybe the father? Also, Aspiration and Judgement or only swords? No gun morphs? No long range options besides her pouch?
But I'll still be voting yes.
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Azoireda Ikteris
- Posts: 54
- Joined: Sat Jun 19, 2021 4:51 am
- Age: 19
- Gender Identity: Female
- Race: Human
- Aura Color: Bright Yellow
- Occupation: Student
- Semblance Name: Dilatorius
- Weapon Name: Aspiration and Judgment
"Alcatraz vs." is indeed the inspiration for Az's lateness.
An overbalanced sword is one which is slightly edge-heavy (as opposed to being hilt-heavy). In Az's case, this is specifically because it allows her to swing them faster - something she relies on in combat.
Az isn't actually sure if her Semblance is what caused her to be born so late or if there were other complications during her birth, but she attributes it to her Semblance since that makes more sense to her.
I'll definitely be filling in a more detailed backstory in her EP (which I'll be doing after I do the ones for my other characters), though she may open up enough to tell someone the story before I get there.
An overbalanced sword is one which is slightly edge-heavy (as opposed to being hilt-heavy). In Az's case, this is specifically because it allows her to swing them faster - something she relies on in combat.
Az isn't actually sure if her Semblance is what caused her to be born so late or if there were other complications during her birth, but she attributes it to her Semblance since that makes more sense to her.
I'll definitely be filling in a more detailed backstory in her EP (which I'll be doing after I do the ones for my other characters), though she may open up enough to tell someone the story before I get there.
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Asterion Khryseos
- Posts: 113
- Joined: Sun Aug 22, 2021 9:57 pm
- Age: 18
- Gender Identity: Male
- Race: Faunus (Bull Horns)
- Aura Color: Gold - CFB53B
- Occupation: Student
- Semblance Name: Dynamo
- Weapon Name: Lustrous Chimera
Everything I have to say's already been covered above, to be quite honest. It's all perhaps a little shorter than what I'm used to, but it gets the important information across.
You might want to get someone to proofread it for you, as there's a few mistakes here and there that you may or may not want fixed, but that's just me being pedantic. As far as I can tell, there's nothing in there that detracts from the app in any way worth noting.
Overall, while there's a few things here and there that you might want to have another look at, I'd say that Azoireda passes muster. I vote in favour of approval.
You might want to get someone to proofread it for you, as there's a few mistakes here and there that you may or may not want fixed, but that's just me being pedantic. As far as I can tell, there's nothing in there that detracts from the app in any way worth noting.
Overall, while there's a few things here and there that you might want to have another look at, I'd say that Azoireda passes muster. I vote in favour of approval.
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Myron Hyles
- Posts: 81
- Joined: Sun Dec 13, 2020 4:58 am
- Age: 18
- Gender Identity: Male
- Race: Human
- Aura Color: Turquoise
- Occupation: Student
- Semblance Name: Sleeping Spell
- Weapon Name: 40 Winks
Probably everything I said for your other approved characters goes for this one too.
The Semblance bothers me a bit because it's actively hampering her, but the need to find ways around it is interesting so why not. I vote Yes. Still not sure how she knows that it's her Semblance, and how it would work if she had two consecutive appointments at the same place (it's very confusing by nature, I guess).
Small comment on what you said, an edge-heavy sword would actually be slower compared to a hilt-heavy one to compensate for higher inertia.
The Semblance bothers me a bit because it's actively hampering her, but the need to find ways around it is interesting so why not. I vote Yes. Still not sure how she knows that it's her Semblance, and how it would work if she had two consecutive appointments at the same place (it's very confusing by nature, I guess).
Small comment on what you said, an edge-heavy sword would actually be slower compared to a hilt-heavy one to compensate for higher inertia.
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Professor Honeydew Monarch
- Posts: 46
- Joined: Sun Aug 11, 2019 4:14 am
- Age: 32
- Gender Identity: Female
- Race: Human
- Aura Color: Seafoam Green
- Occupation: Professor of History and Tactics, Beacon Academy
- Semblance Name: Omnipresence
- Weapon Name: The Kingkiller